Q&A : Breathless

Breathless is a play about hoarding, the way this addiction creeps into people’s lives without them even noticing it and our dealing with the sense of loss in general. Based on the real-life experience of writer Laura Horton, the work is a dark, magical story about trying to escape a world you've spent a lifetime carefully building.

We asked Laura to tell us more about this commonly known but often misunderstood obsession.

This is a play inspired by hoarding. Do you think hoarding is more widespread in our society than we might think?

Absolutely. An estimated 5% of the UK population have hoarding disorder but experts believe the true figure is higher. There is so much shame attached to hoarding behaviours.

Can you tell us more about your personal experience related to hoarding?

I can’t pinpoint the moment it all started but clothes for me have always been a way of escape, a chance to imagine other versions of my life, it always felt like the more clothes I bought the more options I was buying for myself. It wasn’t until I had to move house a few years ago that I realised the extent of my problem. I had thousands of things all suction packed up. I didn’t think of myself as a hoarder because media portrayals were so extreme and mostly older people. I knew I was on a knife-edge though, that I could teeter either way. I decided to just start talking about it online and people contacted me to say what I was saying resonated. It would seem many people, if not hoarders, had more things than they needed. That for me was the turning point why I wrote Breathless.

Are people afraid that by selling or giving away the things they own they will cut the ties to the feelings they associate with them?

I think it varies but I meet a lot of people who fear that in discarding things they will forget the attached memories. I also hoard for future use and I worry that if I let go of those items, I'm distinguishing future versions of myself, however incredulous that sounds.

Is hoarding an addiction?

That's difficult to answer because like all mental health, it manifests differently in different people. For me, the shopping and acquiring was addiction, the inability to let things go seemed to be more to do with my coping mechanisms in the world. For me, I think that was because I didn't realise I was neurodiverse and I was masking a lot, things made me feel safe.

Do you think that material possessions prevent us from achieving better spirituality?

I think they can yes, they certainly did for me. Having things around you can be a great comfort but when they start inhibiting you, or making your life uncomfortable, they can really hold you back.

What are the first steps towards realising you are a hoarder? Do you ever realise this yourself, or do you always need somebody else to point it out to you?

I knew I had too much stuff, could tell by the looks on people's faces when they were in my space and how it made me feel. I think it was a combination of comments and finding out more information from places such as Hoarding UK that helped me to realise I was hoarding. I then started to see a psychotherapist who started helping me to understand why, that was instrumental in me starting to change my behaviours.

Breathless, Pleasance Courtyard (Bunker 2), 3pm, 3-29 August (Not 10 or 17)

BOOK NOW